Don't judge me, but as I laid on the bed with him last night before putting him down, I got a little weepy. I know two months is still really young, but I feel like I am just coming out of the fog, and as I do, I'm realizing I missed his newborn phase.
Granted, he's way bigger than most newborns (12lbs, 5oz and 24.5" long today at his appointment), so that could contribute to that feeling like I just woke up having missed his "newborn" phase. He's also pretty awake and aware most of the time. He has reflux, so for a few weeks whenever he was awake, he was also crying. Now though, his medication has really kicked in and he's so chill and content after he eats and burps. Little dude just lays and stares and if you talk to him or he can stare at himself in the mirror, he smiles a lot. He has the best smiles. So unreserved, and such joy at being talked to and included in the goings-on. Is that because he's a second child and starved for attention? Gosh, I hope not. I hope he never feels left out and attention-needy. I hope he's just a really chill, sweet little guy who delights in his people. And I hope he always smiles as much as he does now!
Isaiah still doesn't love to be carried/worn, but if you catch him at a good moment, he's OK with it. He still pretty much hates the car seat if it's not moving. Strolling in it is fine - as long as he's moving. In the car is fine - as long as it's moving. Buckle him, unbuckle him, whatever - as long as he's moving. For as chill as he is about most things, he loses his mind when the movement stops and he's in the carseat. Isaiah has quite the temper at those moments, which is not something I love, but he makes up for it in smiles.He's started sleeping through the night, and the last two nights, he hasn't even woken for his pacifier around 6 like he was doing. He goes to bed around 10:30, gets a dream feed at 12:30, and then eats around 9 or 9:30. What a blessing to us to have him settling into that rhythm! That's something I could definitely sustain.
He loves his sister, and she loves him. He gives her big smiles whenever she kisses him - which is a lot. His grip is strong, and his grip on our hearts is strong. I know I'm a sap, but I truly feel like this week I'm settling into a really good place, emotionally. I've struggled a lot since he was born - with guilt, with resentment, with feeling like a burden, with thankfulness, with anger...The list goes on. Maybe I'll write more about all that later, but for now, suffice it to say that God has been really good to me, to us. He's been gracious and loving toward me, and he's blessed us with such a sweet little fella. So, without further ado, enjoy Isaiah's 2-month photo with one of his killer smiles :)
